pressing on

Hi loved ones! Sorry we have been MIA  but it's been a crazy month. As you probably already know on August 23,2012 at 10:20pm my dad went to be with Jesus. It was a crazy yet wonderful day, where our Pastor Travis Allen was able to come and visit my Dad, and we were able to clearly see where my dad was spiritually. It was surreal to hear my Dad answer Travis' question of "If you were to stand before God today, what would God say to you?"  for my Dad to answer "I know that I do not deserve to be in heaven because I am a sinner but it is because of Jesus that I know that I will be in welcomed in. Because of what Jesus did and I am so happy believe me I am so happy to die because I have all my trust in Jesus and what he did".
How amazing of a God we have. A God who saves. A God who rejoices in saving his own enemies. A God who doesn't base salvation on right theology or getting all your ducks in a row. A God who himself opens the eyes  and gives sight to the blind, faith to the faithless, help to the helpless.  It is still very emotional as I process all that has happened in the last month since I last wrote. Please bare with me as I write and bare my soul with you.
I pray that this may encourage you, the reader.

The days leading up to this date were sweet and sour. My feelings at the time were that of Gratitude,loneliness, sadness, desperation, and hopeful. Let me explain why I chose those words. Gratitude... I was so grateful to God for bringing my Dad safely over from El Salvador. It was such joy to have him with me and to be with him on a daily basis. It was like having him home again. I knew once seeing him that it was a miracle that he made it through the flight and was present with me. So I felt a daily overwhelming sense of Gratitude.
Loneliness- I am an only child, my husband doesn't speak Spanish and was watching the kids so that I could serve my Dad and Step mom. I just felt so lonely during that time. Words were hard to come by and it was hard to explain or describe all that was happening on a daily basis.
Sadness- seeing my dad deteriorate so rapidly and watching him die was saddening and difficult.
desperation... I was deeply desperate for Jesus Christ... The need of my savior to help me carry the load was overwhelming as well. Seeking him for wisdom, help, comfort, and strength. Desperately praying for the Lord to send his body (which He did, the same day my Dad went home with the Lord. They came before he died and prayed with him and worshiped and after he died) and to save my Dad if he wasn't saved or to strengthen him if he was. At the time I didn't know where my Dad stood. I only knew that there was a chance that he might understand the gospel correctly.
Hope- My hope was in the Lord that anything was possible. I was hopeful that God could heal him and give him more days on this earth if He willed it so. I was filled with hope in Christ that all his needs and mine would be met so that Christ would be glorified.
It was such a sweet sweet time just being by his side. Even if it meant just sitting there in silence next to him or reading to him as he rested. Being able to pour out love onto him was such a blessing and so sweet.
I have never felt such an overwhelming desire to empty myself out for another like I had for my Dad and his wife.
I mean as a Wife and a Mother it is just something we do, without thought, it is a given. So it was so sweet to have been given the opportunity by God and through my husband to be able to do so for my Daddy.
God blessed me and answered my prayer requests abundantly. I did not deserve for God to even hear my pleas yet He lent his ear to me and answered. So here is my praise that God allowed me to be there with my Dad til his very last breath, He didn't have to suffer any more, the day He died was actually one of the best days that my Dad had since arriving from El Salvador. It was spent talking about God, worshiping God in song, and in prayer. He was so alert and talked more than he had in days. God sent friends of mine to pray with him and love on him and my Pastor to do so too. I thank you for praying for him so faithfully. The prayers of a righteous man availeth much.
Please continue to pray for me and for provision and salvation of Vicky, his widow. If you would like to know how to best pray for me, email me and I will let you know.